48 Comments
Jul 22, 2022·edited Oct 23, 2022

Tennis is the Long March, the slow march through the institutions, the Guerra Prolongada Popular (for those of you who know your Sandinista history). Pickleball is the assassination of Julius Cesar, electoral politics, and the quick Tercerista victory (again, reference to Sandinistas). The extended and prolonged struggle to learn and progress in tennis builds revolutionary consciousness and commitment; the quick learning curve of pickle ball is nothing more than a rapid decapitation of the State that leads to "meet the new boss, same as the old boss".

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✊🏽

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Can I get this in pamphlet form?

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Get over it. If you are living outside of congested metro areas, there are plenty of tennis courts - almost all rarely used. Sure more facilities would be nice but first let's use what we have efficiently. Doubt me? Call a few recreation departments who have made the switch of some tennis courts after significant research.

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4 tennis courts = 2-6 people per day

same space for pickle ball = 12 courts

12 pickleball courts and watch them fill with active people of all ages, tennis lost its soul.

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And at huge municipal expense.

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And huge municipal benefit.

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Not gonna lie... this whole thing sounds like a bunch of Tennis players who are just emotionally hurt that Pickleball is growing as a sport and taking away courts that could be better used for Public Pickleball courts; I feel your pain because I also play Tennis on the side (can play at a 4.5 Level), but at the same time... I'd rather Pickleball courts be more plentiful than Tennis courts right now.

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Why can’t we have both? More public space for all!

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The point is pickleballers want to take over public tennis courts. So that's not really more space for all, is it? Pickeball players could find their own facilities.

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pickleballers just want somewhere to play - it's not our fault cities don't want to build extra courts.

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You can literally play it in your goddamn driveway?

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Wow, wealthy elite with your driveway.

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Or I don’t live in a major metro?

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Dec 19, 2022·edited Dec 19, 2022

Mr. Moneybags "just play on your sportsplex driveway" Play tennis in the driveway or golf w/e, there are generally more people that want to play pickleball.

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Shut up nerd

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Because municipal tennis courts are being torn up for pickle ball. It is either/or.

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Because tennis courts take up to much space and not enough people use them.

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This is all satirical, right? The whole concept of "Leftist Tennis" is hilarious--and a wonderful oxymoron. I love the prevailing sentiment that somehow, tennis is a sport of "the people." In fact, the only sports I can think of with a MORE elitist, less proletarian history than tennis are polo and yachting. Your disdain for pickleball players has a thoroughly bourgeois, Let-Them-Eat-Cake quality. Lenin, Marx, and Goldman are all spinning in their graves. Picklers of the world unite!

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Like everything, tennis exists on a spectrum. At one end there are country clubs, private lessons and brand new equipment. The history of the sport does not matter, if there are public tennis courts with lights and hitting walls, its very assessable.

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I knew it was a snake in the grass when it became a “thing” in places like The Villages in Florida - where MAGA parades outnumber proper collared shirts. As a Pacific Northwesterner - I admittedly have enjoyed this sport as I’ve aged (Bainbridge locals not tourists started it) --and it was the first game played in our KingDome. But I digress. I’m for the Separation of Powers, Separation of Church and State, and Separation of Court Sports. Bainbridge Island has a marvelous Pickleball facility (public) and a marvelous Tennis facility (also public) and never do the two have to co-mingle. MORE PUBLIC PARK SPACES - less cars....comrades.

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Thank you for this manifesto. I have been waging war alone against the scourge but now am happy that I have found comrades

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Make pickle, not war.

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What can I say about this "manifesto" or even club leftist for tennis?

I played tennis for 40 years and got to be a good amateur, 4.0 at times. I loved it. Until I blew out my knee and got older. Then the o tennis game I could play turned into a slow "old man's" game, given I'm not on the Senior Circuit. I found pickleball, the perfect game for me. I play it at 3.8 level because the court is smaller, the speed is slower, and I can reach balls I no longer can reach in tennis. I watch older tennis player and most of them spend their time fetching balls they no longer can hit. I for one, don't find that fun. Do the folks subscribing to this blog do?

Moreover, unlike tennis, where I wound up whacking most of the time at the baseline, I'm at the net in pickleball most of the time and let me tell you, it is far more fun rallying at the net compared to pounding ground strokes all the time.

Also, I seldom lose a game in pickleball to a high powered server because, well, he or she has to serve underhand. There have to be multiple strokes.

My son is a 4.0 tennis player and guess what, he's moving to pickleball too. So are lots of young people who find, get this, tennis as elitist. Them mix of people of all stripes, ages, races and genders on the pickleball courts I play on--every kind imaginable --is far greater than when I played tennis. Grandfathers with grandsons. Fathers with daughters. And giving no quarter because the leg speed and reflexes of the young ones balance the skill sets of the older.

And the idea that adding more courts per unit space to accommodate pickleball, compared to tennis is elitist, well, that frankly is insane. More people can play the sport?

I have to think the manifesto is satire. Otherwise I'd really wonder what kind of reality the writers find themselves in.

But I do grant Pickleball can be noisy. I imagine in the future new balls and paddles will dampen that noise. I wouldn't mind. Some pickle ballers will scream a bit but it will happen. Because the sport will inexorably expand once it goes Olympic, which will happen in a few years. Hell, old shopping centers are being turned into pickleball facilities. I've even invested in a company that does it. Pickleball is actually the MOST non-elitist sport there is short of broom ball. The basic paddles are cheap, the balls are cheap, and you can even get a net setup for cheap that can be placed in a driveway with chalk linings. Try that with tennis.

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Start tearing up golf courses. Lots of space for pickleball courts. Golf courses are a waste of space.

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yo does anybody play tennis in philadelphia

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Tennis is yuppie nonsense. Basketball is the people's sport.

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The best place to find anti pickleball apparel and accessories

https://www.bonfire.com/store/the-tennis-purist-fyofc/

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Tennis... too exclusive, too expensive, too eliteist. I loved tennis for 20 year, but pickleball... it better.

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Is this satire?

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Organizing towards Antipickleball Aktion merch. Who's with me?!

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