As Comrade Lenin once wrote, “A party is the vanguard of a class, and its duty is to lead the masses and not merely to reflect the average political level of the masses.”
It’s important to us here at Club Leftist Tennis that we not merely reflect the pablum of commentary found on Twitter and the Tennis Channel. We want to challenge and excite, and where politically appropriate, accept disagreement and discourse.
Therefore we asked some of the top minds in leftist tennis, from across the country and across the ideological spectrum (of left tendencies), to preview the U.S. Open. Enjoy!
1) Who do you predict will win the Open?
Jay Caspian Kang, staff writer the New Yorker, well-adjusted tennis loser: Novak on the men's side. On the women's side, I feel a lot more conflicted because I want Ons to win every tournament and I want Coco to finally break through, but I also have a lot of respect for how Sabalenka and Iga have dominated this year. I'll just go with my heart here and say Ons.
Heems, rapper, Queens native: I like Alcaraz to win but I fuck with Tiafoe too. I fuck with Coco Gauff on the women’s side.
Matthew Gasda, playwright of Dimes Square, Ardor, & others: You wanna fade Alcaraz, but I don't. For the women, I think it's Coco's moment. I don't know why.
Jennifer Welch, I’ve Had It podcast & Bravo’s Sweet Home Oklahoma: I don’t think there’s any question that Novak or Carlos are favorites to take the slam. Meddy Bear just hasn’t had the muscle this season. Tsitsipas doesn’t have it, and I find myself incredulous that a guy that has a joint instagram with his girlfriend has the mindset or killer instincts to go five sets on Ashe. Sascha and Big Foe will have a good run, but I don’t see either of them advancing past the quarters. Ruud, Rune, and Sinner could be problematic, but five sets in a slam is a different beast, and only Carlos and Novak have proven they can perform the mental gymnastics required for five sets. Carlitos in five.
Drew Millard, author of How Golf Can Save Your Life: Cards out on the table here, I know absolutely nothing about tennis. I assume my Club Leftist Tennis comrades asked me to do this because (A), I am the Leftist Golf Guy and therefore extremely a fellow traveler on the road of commies repping for non-football/basketball-style sports, and (B) because I asked them to read from their manifesto at the launch of my leftist golf book. Anyways… *checks FanDuel* uhhhh, I’m going with Medvedev in the Men’s division and Gauff in the Women’s.
2) What storyline are you most looking forward to?
Heems: My favorite storyline I guess is how Frances Tiafoe develops.
Gasda: Pegula surprise run to women's final.
Welch: In lieu of telling you a storyline I’m looking forward to, let me get into my brand of I’ve Had It, and tell you what story I’m not looking forward to. If the Novak Djokovic circle jerk that I’ve seen thus far on the @USOpen Instagram account is to continue into the tournament, well…. I’ve Had It!! I watched an entire Instagram reel of him hitting tennis balls with skillets, two by fours, and other random objects. As someone who prides myself on never watching one second of the Kardashians, this was a new low. I watched another reel of him impersonating other tennis players serves – from start to finish. Collectively, I’ve given about 15 minutes of my life to this post-Covid rebrand that I’ll never get back. Novak is an incredible tennis player, but beyond that, he’s just not likable. However, I do thoroughly enjoy watching him lose. When he gets so mad that he smashes his tennis racquet, I smile and it brings me joy.
I just realized I didn’t mention the women. I’m all chips in on Sabalenka. She’s nuts, an absolute basket case on the court, and I can’t get enough of it. Just when you think she should play it safe because she’s committed too many errors, she terrorizes the ball. I enjoy this type of unhinged compulsivity and reckless disregard for composure. The double down, the triple down on pelting a winner - I love it. I know she’s from Belarus, and that’s not very leftist, but remember, I’m from Oklahoma, and that’s not even remotely leftist.
Kang: Ons in "why the fuck not" mode hitting drop shots and weird slices. Not sure that one's going to happen, but I hope it does.
Millard: The thing’s always in NYC, right? I guess the storyline I am most interested is whether any of the pro tennis people are secretly down with whichever hipster seasteading crew is currently bankrolling the downtown scene.
3) If you could change one thing about the Open, presumably to make it more leftist, what would you choose?
Millard: Okay I just looked it up and it’s in Flushing Meadows. All the tennis players should have to also participate in a pitch-and-putt tournament at the Flushing Meadows Golf Center, my favorite place in NYC and an exemplar of what low-footprint public golf should be in America. Also admission should be free, all the tennis players’ names should be written in lowercase letters on the leaderboard attendees’ names should be written in all uppercase on their tickets because we need to reappropriate the capitals.
Heems: VAR! Not a fan in soccer. Won’t like it here.
Kang: I love the US Open but I've never been to a sporting event that feels more like a corporate meet and greet. It feels like everyone should have a lanyard on and be standing by a coffee machine in the corner of Ballroom 6 at the Convention Center Marriot in Las Vegas or something.
Welch: As a liberal living in a deep red state, I take recommendations regarding a leftist agenda rather seriously and more aggressively than a New Yorker that solely breathes leftist air. First and foremost, the US Open needs to ban John Isner. The guy is a douche, a Trumper, and not only bad for tennis, but also for America. Secondly, allow liberals from red states pre-purchase tickets before they go live. We are literally in the trenches taking grenades deep in abortion ban America, can somebody throw us a bone?
Gasda: Establish gulags in Flushing, liquidate pickleball influencers, give box seats to union workers.